I Forgive You

(M)    Medical Procedures

(V)    Violence

I Forgive You, Mel,

for what you did to me.

I know that you did not know, that there was no oxygen 

coming through the air pipe and the oxygen mask 

that you were holding over my nose and mouth,

in the "operation".

Did my father tell you to hold it there, tight ?

He was a frightening and cruel man.

Yes, I did suffocate and die.

My heart stopped.

I don't know for how long.

When I was revived, you were gone.

Maybe they used electric paddles to start my heart again.

I think that's why I have always been lethargic, 

with very shallow breathing.

It makes a person weak and tired, permanently.

And there was no transcendence.

I just blacked out, and that was that.

I'm sorry that you had to see my dead eyes.

It will be a memory that you will never get rid of.

Neither of us knew, that that was going to happen.

If we did, we could both have done something to stop it.

But, it happened.

And we both failed.

I think it's important to understand the context of the situation.

You were 12 or so, I was 6.

We were expected to perform duties

that only trained adults can undertake.

We were bound to fail.

We were not then, and are not now, surgical experts.

You won't be expected to help perform any surgical operation on me again.

My father won't be doing it !! 

And Robyn won't be attending as nurse !

(/This message is intended for Mel Gibson, the Actor, Director etc)

The image is from the film, "Flatliners (2017)"

text (c) Katherine Stuart 2017